The ‘A’ Team Song
In Heathrow we gathered from far and from wide
To throw up our dinners and swallow our pride
The Qatary ladies, they treated us fine
But the Lukla attendant was simply sublime.
CHORUS
And it’s CPX testing (right up bike!)
And spirometry
It all seems a load of old b------s to me.
I’ve been with trek ‘A’ for many a day
And I’ve puked and I’ve pooed along the way
We’ve laughed and we’ve sung and got on just fine
We really have had a fantabulous time.
CHORUS
In Namche we listened to Monty all night
There’s no doubt the fellow is full of sh-information
We’ve walked, biked and trained and now we’re so lean
We’re certain we’ll outpace the summit team.
CHORUS
The testing in Namche I grew to dislike
It got me so bad I threw up on the bike
I’m sure that they used it that night for our tea
For the Dahl bat, it tasted familiar to me.
CHORUS
Christine and Gerry got left behind
They slept with six Sherpas and they didn’t mind
They caught up the next day in bleak Pheriche
Covered in yak dung looking cheery.
CHORUS
Every cold morning we do this diary
And everyone thinks that we are all crazy
The sats and the stepping makes us feel quite sick
Whoever invented it is a right Richard.
CHORUS
Rice and noodles and noodles and rice
And rice and noodles and oodles of rice
Dahl bat, and pancakes, porridge and toast
The food at base camp we liked the most
CHORUS
Our Sherpas and porters and yaks are the best
We surely do love them when they let us rest
They carry our test kit with awesome panache
We do wish they’d drop it into a crevasse.
CHORUS
Hypoxia, ataxia, they’re jolly long words
We’ll leave all that bollocks for you science nerds
You might think our comments a trifle unfair
But we blame it on trekking up into thin air.
CHORUS
